"I Don't See Jesus in You"
Somebody said that to me a week ago.
It definitely wrecked me.
Because they were right.
If you read my "All Summer Sixteen" post you know that I am entering a season of some heavy spiritual growth. So how does one react to a comment like, " I don't see Jesus in you."? In my case it was the opposite of how I would have normally answered that.
I said, "You're right." And then your ENTJ friend cried. Not sad tears but those of sweet conviction. And we were able to have a good talk about it.
The comment came from a friend who has witnessed me hitting some low points in my walk while attempting to act like I had it all together for my Christian friends. A dark season that came right after I had begun that friendship and so intensely tried to shove God down their throat that I became legalistic and prideful. Such a twisted season of me trying to show them Jesus while engaging in sinful behavior with them, fully knowing that it would undo what "I" had been "working at".
But this is a different season and a year later. I have grown since then but they did not know that. And they should not had to have heard or read it from me. This person should have noticed a difference when we began to engage in conversation.
I struggle with behaving how God calls me to and how the world wants me to do so. And my prideful side would like to announce that it has been aware of that. What it does not want to admit is that I finally understand how my roller coaster of actions has affected my witness.
There should never be any confusion about where I find my identity and who I serve.
Friends, please pray for my relationship with God and that I am always walking so close to Jesus so I never have to hear "I don't see Jesus in you," ever again.
Spiritual growing pains y'all.